Title: Everything Lost Regained
Author: MissAnnThropic
E-Mail: miss_annthropic@yahoo.com
Spoilers: Existence
Summary: The other side.
Disclaimer: I own nasing! Really, I don't. All you see here (that you recognize, anyway) is the creation of someone else. I take no credit.



The fog seemed indomitably thick at first, but slowly it began to clear. Utter confusion began to take shape, but only to be replaced by an almost equable bafflement. Even so, there was no fear... it seemed completely engulfed by the all encompassing curiosity and determination to unfold the hazy mystery before him.

Fox Mulder frowned, looking around as the cloud that had seemed to so recently surround him melted away, and he could finally see his surroundings.

It was dark... in the distance there were stars, but not the same way the stars he knew were. These were distant, but not so far that they appeared untouchable. Mulder felt that, if he walked far enough, he could touch one of the burning lights in the distance.

And then he realized that he could have walked to them, if he so chose. There wasn't quite a floor beneath him, but yet something supported him as if hoovering inside the heavens.

Mulder turned, the thought occurring that maybe this was a dream.

"It's no dream, Fox."

Mulder turned quickly, finding a figure a mere four feet in front of him where moments before there had been only darkness. Mulder was so taken by surprise at the man's presence, it took him a moment to register his face. Even longer to believe it, for it had been so long ago that he stood face to face with this man.

"Dad?" Mulder squinted, brow creasing. It couldn't be... unless this was in fact a dream, and the strangest one he'd ever had. This felt so real.

William Mulder smiled that tight, restrained smile Mulder had known so often when he was a small boy. The smile of a father who wanted to love his children but was afraid to get close. A father who hoped that to not show affection for his children he might spare them. A hope that was dashed as cruelly as any could be.

"Hello, Fox," the figure spoke again, taking a step closer. He looked just like Mulder remembered him, he had not aged a day from the one years ago when he was shot. To Mulder, it seemed like a lifetime ago. In a sense, it was.

William still wore the khaki pants and blue sweater that Mulder remembered seeing him in last... in fact, in this same place.

Mulder struggled to remember where that had been... he remembered these same stars, his father, the darkness. Then he recalled his father's words, "If you die now the truth dies too, and only the lies survive us." Mulder had been here... when he was on the brink of death.

Mulder reflexively shied from his father's form, "Where are we?"

William's lips pursed, in the same mannerism Mulder knew so well, then sighed, "It's good to see you again, Fox... good to see this time you're not so young... like before."

Mulder swallowed, "When you told me to go back."

William nodded, well aware that his son had all but figured it out, reluctant to say it though he might be.

Mulder's mind raced. He fought to remember where he could recall being last. He'd been at his house, in bed. Scully had been next to him, lying on her side facing him, running her fingers loosely through the gray hairs on his chest. Mulder felt a calm at remembering her face. Even though age had caught up with her, he still thought she was stunning. Her hair was almost all gray, the pronounced crows feet wrinkles at her eyes and the lines around her mouth thickened to match his... but they were more content than either had been in a long time. Then, Mulder remembered that as he lay there touching Scully's hair softly, the constant and chronic ache in his chest he'd come to live with for years had eased. Slowly, the pain lifted, and a great peace and desire to sleep came over him. The last he remembered was closing his eyes, Scully's head nestled on his shoulder, his fingers falling away from her hair.

Mulder shuddered and swallowed his encroaching pallor, looking up at his father before him and asking, "Am I dead?"

William, for one of the rare times when Mulder had known him while alive, let an actual warmth and tenderness creep into his eyes as he nodded slowly, "I'm afraid so, son."

Mulder felt sick, though even then he could feel something greater than himself trying to ease the illness. He fought the comfort, though, wanting his sickened feeling as he thought in despair, "Scully..."

William looked calmly at his son, "Whoever you've left behind, find comfort in the fact you'll be together again."

Mulder asked glumly, "In this place?"

William nodded, looking around at the stars. He stated calmly, "Your mother's here... would you like to see her?"

Mulder couldn't answer, still thinking of how he'd left Scully, wondering when it occurred to her that he had died. Probably the moment his heart stopped beating... her head had been on his chest, she had probably been listening to his heartbeat right to the end.

William interrupted Mulder's thoughts, "You've grown, Fox."

Mulder shook his head faintly at the absurdity of it, "You mean I've gotten old."

William shrugged, "We all do... except here. You can be any age you want to be. You're as young as you want to feel here, Fox."

"Is this heaven?"

William bit back a laugh, "No... to tell you the truth, I've been here longer than I can remember and I'm still not sure what is it. But we're all here, the family."

Mulder looked up at his father, "Samantha?"

William's eyes grew moist at the word, misty tears of a father's joy, "Yes, Fox... your sister is here, too."

Mulder sighed, amazed in a dull wonderment how he could feel so heavy when he was seemingly floating in the stars.

William stepped closer to his son, lifting one foot to rest on one of the two lawn chairs that just appeared there, as equally suspended as either man, "I'm sorry you were the last one, Fox."

Mulder sat heavily in the other seat, asking with a frown, "Last one what?"

William took a breath, "Last in our family to die. I know it had to be hard on you... I don't envy you seeing us all die before you."

Mulder folded his hands, looking at them (discovering they did in fact look like the hands of a 35 year old... an age much younger than he had been moments before).

William sat down next to his son, looking over at him then asking, "Did you have a good life, Fox?"

Mulder looked up, cocking his head, "Can't you see everything from up here?"

William smiled, a fatherly and patient smile in the face of ignorance, "I told you this isn't heaven, Fox. It's... more of a purgatory, but not a bad one. We're just HERE, but it's not the same as it was back there. We can't see or know anything that's happening for them. We're here until they join us."

Mulder nodded, then smiled. He found he couldn't keep a bad mood here, as though something in the air was narcotizing him, taking away the edge of sadness and fear. "I had a good life, Dad."

William sighed heavily, "You don't know how glad I am to hear that. I was so worried you wouldn't. When you were young, you were so driven, so intense... I was afraid you'd never stop to live."

Mulder smirked, "I was like that for a long time. I would have probably brought myself here sooner chasing some strange phantom were it not for Scully."

"Scully? Your partner when you were in the FBI, right?"

Mulder nodded, smiling at the mental image of her face, "I was with her right before I came here... I hope she's all right."

William Mulder paused, asking curiously, "Your FBI partner? What was she doing there?"

Mulder laughed, "Well... that's a long story, actually. Short end of it is, about eight years after she came to be my FBI partner we became a lot more than FBI partners."

Finally, a knowing smile came to William's face. "Oh... I see."

Mulder wondered if he could possibly be blushing. Mulder frowned suddenly, "We were supposed to go see Heather and Jeremy next Saturday..."

"Heather and Jeremy?"

Mulder nodded, mind preoccupied as he answered, "Our grandchildren."

William startled, "You have grandchildren? You have children?"

Mulder looked up at his father, letting his concern melt away to smile, "You thought I'd never have kids?"

William blinked, "I guess I never imagined it. I always pictured Sam the type to have children. You never struck me as the type to."

Mulder nodded, "I wouldn't have if it hadn't been Scully."

"You and your old FBI partner Scully have children?"

Mulder smiled softly, "We have a son... William."

William Mulder obviously started at this, staring at Mulder.

Fox looked out at the stars, "Scully named him after you. He was a miracle... they told Dana she'd never be able to have children, but then William... we never found out how it happened. He shouldn't have been born, but thank god he was. We were going to see his children this weekend. His wife Deborah reminds me so much of Samantha... you'd like her. Heather and Jeremy are a lot like me and Sam were when we were little. We were going to see them this weekend..." Mulder trailed off.

William Mulder touched his son's shoulder, "I'm proud of you, Fox."

Mulder's face twisted, "For what?"

William shrugged, "For contradicting my expectations. When you came here so long ago, I was certain you'd be back again before your time. I was afraid that you were destined to meet an early death. I didn't want that for you... but I expected it. I'm proud you came to know what of a normal life you could."

Mulder patted his father's hand, standing and turning to face his father.

Before he could utter a word, a single voice spoke from behind him, "Mulder."

Mulder turned, not ready to believe his ears.

But his eyes showed the same thing his ears had heard. She was there... right there. Scully.

Scully stood a short distance away from them, looking confused but a flooding relief in her face to see Mulder again. She looked 30 again.

Mulder blinked, looking at his father, then up at Scully, "I... I just left you."

William pipped in behind him, "Time's pretty subjective here. The wait can seem like years or seconds... it takes a while to get the hang of it, and you haven't been here long enough to figure it out yet."

"Mulder?" Scully called his attention back. She hesitantly stepped toward him. "What's going on?"

Mulder stepped toward her, "Scully... we're... how do I say this. We're kind of... dead."

Scully arched one brow at him, "Kind of?"

Mulder smiled at her, "Okay... we're very dead."

Scully's face grew tight, "I... your funeral... it was only yesterday."

Mulder stepped quickly close to her, bringing up a hand and touching a finger to her lips, "Don't think about it. Remember something better... you'll be surprised how easy it is to feel content here."

Scully's smile told him she felt the effect already, "I missed you, Mulder."

Mulder pulled her to him, wrapping his arms around her and whispering into her hair, "I feel like I've been missing you for an eternity."

Scully smirked, "You've only been dead five days, Mulder."

Mulder smiled, "Feels longer than that. I see you weren't long in coming after me. Some things never change, do they? Come on, I want you to meet my father."

"Your dad's here?"

Mulder smiled at her, "I'm guessing yours is too. They're all here, Scully."

Scully pulled up, looking at him in shock. As though to answer her question, a Navy uniform clad man appeared from the darkness approaching Scully.

Scully blinked, "Ahab?"

William Scully smiled, "Hello, Starbuck."

Scully smiled through tears, "I'm glad to see you, Dad... there's someone I've always wished you'd known. I want you to meet my husband, Fox Mulder."



END